weather ball blue

colder weather in view.

weather ball black? nuclear attack.

i cant remember yesterday,

or the story of how we got this way.

did i take,

     a left or right?

if only id learn to stop traveling at night.

everything looks so different in the day light.

but i cant help it.

this weather makes me seriously nostalgic..

i dont know what to say.

i could waste hours, of my day

away.

but i know thats unhealthy.

it'll just led to my early death.

why cant i find a way to remember the cons on the list?

i needed such help trying to find them to begin with.

the most obvious, theres no need to point out.

"is there a reason i've never met you before?"

...probably because  i don't go to bars.

i hang out in cars.

driving places, getting lost in spaces,

then leaving too soon.

or maybe it's because 

i'm new to this game,

&i  cant pronounce your name 

-without secretly feeling embarrassed

because the first time, i said it wrong.

maybe it was all too much "opposites-attract"?

even through there were similarities to match.

but you're stuck in winter while i'm so obviously destined to fall.

spring couldn't come more quickly,

i cant take these reminders of snow.

its such a deceiving thing.

at first- fresh. white.

purest, cleanest snow.

but what happens, when it feels like negative four

and everything around you looks the same. you're stuck in a blizzard; blank white slate.

you get lost in a moment, but you're already aware you cant let it carry you away. 

&&snow is only clean for so long.

after awhile, even it gets tainted.

with all the dirt and salt,

litter gets hidden in it..

 once spring hits, 

all the secrets once hidden in the snow, are revealed. 

sorry. i've sorta strayed from the point of all this.

i just cant help but be reminded of what i lack.

education. transportation.

any extra money at that...

so thanks for inviting me to that party.

didn't know you'd ditch me for the V.I.P. room.

of course my names not on the list.

i failed to mention that you're a hypocrite.

 the similarities, in all of these

is that i should just stop trying. obviously.